And we all say
"Oh, well I never, was there ever
A gloom stalker as magical
He is loud and large, he is black
From the snout to the tip of his tail
He can pierce through illusions to track
With fleshless wings he sails
His shrouded form is looking for a snack
He is equally quick with his claws like a knife
He is always deceiving you into believing
That he's only hunting for life...
- (0:01:35) Matt: Wednesday Club, Mr. Taliesin Jaffe? Taliesin: Yeah, we’ve got something special planned, but I don’t know if it’s official yet, but I think that we’re going to be celebrating Pride Month and we may have a special guest. I can’t say for sure, but we’re gonna be talking-- Sam: It’s Stan Lee. [...] Liam and Taliesin: Excelsior! [...] Matt: Go watch it, True Believers!
- (0:02:08) Liam: Why limit myself to just one? Sam: That’s Gilbert Gottfried?
- (0:03:14) Ashley: There’s a time jump in Blindspot…
- (0:09:03) Matt: Like a very dark, thunderous Seattle. Ashley: Hello, Seattle. (“Hello Seattle” by Owl City)
- (0:13:21) Taliesin: Pie Jesu Domine, Dona eis Requiem. (Monty Python and the Holy Grail)
- (0:15:11) Matt: ...behind you have Grog Frankenstein-ing his way down the street. Liam: Super duper! Travis: Puttin’ on the ritz! (Young Frankenstein)
- (0:16:45) Marisha: Like parting for the queen at the Ren Faire.
- (0:18:00) Taliesin: Way to be Fonzies. (Happy Days)
- (0:19:49) Liam: So this is just Osgiliath, right? (Lord of the Rings)
- (0:21:25) Matt: ...left to slowly collapse like a flan in cupboard. (Eddie Izzard) NSFW
- (0:28:54) Marisha: I can tell by his Cheers shirt!
- (0:35:20) Sam: Shirley Temple. Liam: Sounds like Cosette. Marisha: I was about to say, very Les Mis.
- (0:36:00) Sam: She can super fast, since she’s not real. She’s like the f***ing Flash.
- (0:36:08) Liam: (very quickly) There is a lady all in white, holds me and sings a lullaby… Laura and Ashley: There is a castle on a cloud. [...] Laura: She’s sweeping as she’s running. Taliesin: Crying at all is not allowed. (“Castle on a Cloud” from Les Miserables)
- (0:36:30) Matt: So, the little girl goes from like (crying noises) to (running noises) and just goes into a full sprint in a really creepy Ring-style way.
- (0:38:50) Liam: You are a terrible stage mom, by the way. Sam: Oh, yeah, well, she died. She got her Equity card.
- (0:44:35) Taliesin: It comes in green and red, available in the Resident Evil universe.
- (0:54:49) Vax: Kiki, would you be able to Great Escape us under this wall?
- (0:57:24) Matt: … you make it all the way across the wall and kind of get low-- Marisha: Get low, get low, get low. (“Get Low” by Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz) NSFW
- (0:58:13) Liam: Rabble rabble rabble rabble. (South Park)
- (0:58:16) Marisha: Wakka wakka wakka. (Pac-Man)
- (0:58:31) Matt: Yeah, it’s the old Warner Brothers rule.
- (0:58:33) Matt: So, as you guys all one-by-one dart across and leap beneath the tunnel that Keyleth had created. Liam: Parkour!
- (1:02:50) Laura: *singing* The hills are alive! (The Sound of Music)
- (1:05:47) Scanlan: We’ll need a name for him, obviously, so anybody got any ideas. Laura: Benjamin. Scanlan: Benjamin is great. Marisha: Mr. Mistoffelees. Laura: Even better. (Cats)
- (1:10:07) Laura: Does it look like there’s any windows on the tower, or is a big ole Rapunzel tower?
- (1:11:23) Liam: Rogue One.
- (1:13:20) Matt: He looks like the old D&D Dungeon Master from the cartoon. (Dungeons and Dragons)
- (1:16:14) Laura: He did the hand signal for Arnold Palmer.
- (1:19:45) Liam: Pike got Dragon Aged.
- (1:20:46) Matt: There’s just this slumped pile of dark cloth, thin body, and Riki-Oh mess just there on the ground. (Riki-Oh: The Story of Ricky)
- (1:23:40) Liam: *hums Mr. Mistoffeles*
- (1:58:56) Marisha: This Old House.
- (2:04:55) Marisha: ...it’s like walking into the Danger Zone. (by Kenny Loggins)
- (2:07:57) Sam: Me and Pike, she could be on my shoulders and we could share one cloak! Marisha: Totally Little Rascals it!
- (2:08:53) Matt: There will be no survivors! Taliesin: The Dwead Piwate Woberts is here for your soul! (The Princess Bride)
- (2:24:46) Matt: Your cloak tears around your body, Incredible Hulk-style.
- (2:25:03) Matt: It’s almost one of the Chippendales neckpieces.
- (2:32:35) Multiple: Hey you guys! (Goonies)
- (2:34:12) Matt: You see-- Taliesin: Conan O’Brien! Marisha: Doctor Strange!
- (2:37:28) Ashley: We are fully Leroy Jenkinsing this right now. Many: LEROY JENKINS! Liam: Just going to say it: we are not prepared.
- (2:39:24) All: Yup! Yup! Uh-huh! Yup! (S-town)
- (2:46:13) Liam: And I said biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii- (Key & Peele) NSFW
- (3:08:32) Taliesin: Hit her with a mind bullet. Travis and Taliesin: Mind Bullets! Travis, Taliesin, and Marisha: That’s telekinesis Kyle! How ‘bout the power to move you? Liam: *sings guitar riff* (Wonderboy by Tenacious D) NSFW
- (3:09:13) Liam, singing: You’ll f***ing lead as two kings! (City Hall by Tenacious D) NSFW
- (3:11:54) Travis, singing: Don’t worry, be happy. (Don’t Worry, Be Happy by Bobby McFerrin)
- (3:48:15) Marisha: Justice rains from above! (Overwatch)
- (3:54:55) Scanlan: Counterspell! Baby, don’t hurt me, don’t hurt me, no more! Counterspell! (What is Love by Haddaway)
- (4:03:19) Sam: Should we call Wil Wheaton to fill in for Liam from now on? Liam: That’s my next call.
- (4:07:18) Taliesin: So Beetlejuice! So Beetlejuice!
- (4:10:13) Taliesin: We need a bigger boat. (Jaws)
- (4:13:52) Matt: ...and you watch as light and flames just burst out of her like a Doctor regenerating. (Doctor Who)
- (4:19:23) Laura: I need Taco Bell right now in my life. Ashley: I want Taco Bell so bad.
- (4:20:39) Matt: That was some old-school Magic the Gathering s*** right there.
- (4:20:45) Ashley: You just pulled out the wild Uno card.
- (4:21:50) I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful, it’s true. You saw my face in a crowded place and you didn’t know what to do, ‘cause I just took a s*** on you. (“You’re Beautiful” by James Blunt)
- (0:03:37) Matt: I’m pretty sure she makes her own bakery/cake store. It’s gonna be great. Anyway, it’s called the Slayers Bake.
- (0:38:39) Travis: Moving s*** out of the way of the door in a-- Taliesin: Medium pace. Travis: Yeah, let’s call it a medium well.
- (0:42:21) Taliesin: I’m showing Keyleth what’s in the censer. Sam: An uncensored view?
- (0:44:00) Taliesin: [About the Wilds Guide] It’s an herb.
- (0:45:33) Marisha: Actually, should we, like, dab ourselves with it [the Wilds Guide]? Matt: Really, after all that, no dab joke?
- (1:45:40) Matt: It’s not even a top or bottom circumstance, you’re actually just within. Liam: It really depends on the day.
- (1:54:13) Taliesin: The less people we’re fighting, the worse it is. Ashley: It won’t just be three. Sam: It’ll be… less than three (<3)?
- (1:58:49) Sam: Why didn’t you just name it a Poobah Platter?
- (4:11:21) Ashley: Sorry, I’m so hot. Sam: That’s what I say to myself every morning.