Talks Machina Episode 86 Highlights: 2-38

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Tonight’s guests are Sam Riegel and Taliesin Jaffe (and, as always, Dani Carr and… Tiny Corner Max?)!

  • Announcements:

    • The latest episode of Between the Sheets, featuring Daytime Emmy Award-Winning Sam Riegel ™, aired last night and will be available on YouTube tomorrow morning. Sam: “I feel like this channel is mostly just you and me talking?” Brian: “Are you saying that everyone else is just riding our coattails?” Taliesin: “He’s also saying that you look a lot like Liam at this point, and he can’t tell the difference.”

    • Another episode of All Work No Play will debut this Friday on the Critical Role Twitch (uploaded to YouTube on Sunday). In this episode, Sam and Liam do yoga… with goats. TJ Storm and Travis Willingham guest star!

    • Next week the cast will be at London MCM! Taliesin: “I’m packing slightly more tweed.” Brian: “Gettin’ tweedy with it.”

    • There’s a new (harp music) Laura Bailey emote on the CR Twitch for subscribers.

  • Stats for this week’s episode:

    • The M9 hit 150 natural ones in this episode. Number 150 was Jester’s acrobatics check to get away from the yuan-ti abomination.

    • Jester also set the record for the most natural ones in a single episode: 5. The previous record of 4 was held by Nott and Beau. Brian: “You guys remember these are not still going to charity, right?” Sam and Taliesin: “What?”

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Crash Pandas: Too Trashed, Too Curious Masterpost

Crash Pandas: Too Trashed, Too Curious Masterpost

Thanks to @sephiramy for this art piece!

Car Names

Select your vehicle. Then poison the driver.

  • (0:15:00) R.E.V. Speedwagon: Burnt umber 1978 caprice station wagon

  • (0:15:09) Taxicab Concussions: Beat-up NYC Taxicab with the doors painted shut.

  • (0:15:16) Victor von Vroom: Green Corvette that looks zippy but hard to control

  • (0:15:24) The Exterminator: Royal blue exterminator van with Pest Control emblazoned on the side

  • (0:15:33) Mr. Fastee: A huge ice cream truck

  • (1:38:02) Sasscar: An adorable little mini roadster racer.

  • (1:38:32) Mothah Truckah: A tweaked-out GMC pickup that looks steady but slow, but very firm.

  • (1:38:50) Actual Vin Diesel: A supercharged engine.

  • (1:39:32) The Champion, a.k.a. Roadkill: Yellow and blue customized Ferrari with claws out front, its hood ornamented with a raccoon skull.

  • (1:40:30) This Guy On A Motorcycle.

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Song of the Lorelei Masterpost

Song of the Lorelei Masterpost

Thanks to @totalpartykillr for this art piece!

For the Third Annual Burning Man One-Shot Filler Episode, Liam O’Brien takes us into another part of Wildemount, where we see another facet of the continent’s residents. The effects of wars of the past have shaped the lives of many, and the tale of the Lorelei bloodline proves that the wars of old have ways of living beyond their end...

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Talks Machina Episode 80 Highlights: 2-32

This summary has been reproduced from this Tumblr post.

Tonight’s guests are Liam O’Brien and Sam Riegel!

  • Announcements: 

    • No Talks Machina next Tuesday, but they will be back the following week to discuss episode 33 of CR. Next Tuesday, instead of Talks, they’re filming something very special for the new channel. Sam: “You are? Oh, god.” 

    • Handbooker Helper premieres tomorrow at 10 AM Pacific Time at! The first episode focuses on dice basics. 

    • There’s a new charity drive for the Pablove Foundation, dedicated to research toward ending children’s cancer; they’ve already hit the first $20k benchmark, which means Sam will be DMing a game of Crash Pandas! The next goal is $50k, which will be used to establish a research grant.

  • Stats for this episode:

    • Nott has successfully disguised herself 12 times since the campaign started.

    • Caleb’s most-cast spells (in order): Alarm, Firebolt, and Identify.

    • The party has spent 55 of their 81 days together on the road.

    • Gustav’s sentence in Trostenwald lasted 77 days. He averaged about 7 gold, 8 copper per day of work.

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Talks Machina Episode 75 Highlights: SDCC 2018

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Tonight's guests are Marisha Ray, Taliesin Jaffe, Sam Riegel, Liam O’Brien, and Matt Mercer!

This episode was pre-recorded on Saturday, and hence there is a tragic lack of After Dark content. Please turn off all your lights after the episode airs to simulate the After Dark experience. Thank you.

  • Announcement:

    • Vox Machina: Origins will be back in 2019! The next arc (the first arc to really kick in for the home game) will be about meeting Pike and Percy.

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Talks Machina Episode 73 Highlights: 2-25

This summary has been reproduced from this Tumblr post.

Tonight’s guests are Ashley Johnson and Sam Riegel!

  • Announcements:

    • TM is headed to San Diego Comic Con again this year! On Tuesday, July 24 (the Tuesday after their Saturday panel), the panel will be broadcast in TM’s usual time slot. Wyrmwood giveaways are back starting this week, but will be hosted in the Critical Role Twitch chat moving forward.

    • New shirt in the store (featuring Nott and Jester’s detective agency!).

  • Stats​ for this episode:

    • Yasha is practically tied with Fjord for highest average damage dealt per episode (35.875 for Yasha, 36.040 for Fjord).

    • Nott maintains her lead for the most natural ones (23). Sam points out that he’s using the same dice as last campaign and suspects the proximity to the baby may have been a curse on his luck. Ashley: “I feel like he couldn’t possibly be a curse on anyone.” Sam: “No, he’s a demon child. Have you held up a mirror to the child to see if it has a reflection? That’s all I’m saying.”

    • It’s been 34 days since the Mighty Nein met in Trostenwald. Ashley points out that it’s starting to be a substantial number of days for everyone to have been spending all their time together.

    • Kiri was with the Mighty Nein for 11 days.

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Talks Machina Episode 71 Highlights: 2-23

This summary has been reproduced from this Tumblr post.

Tonight's guests are Matt Mercer and Sam Riegel!

  • Announcements:

    • New M9 shirt in the new CR store at The show also now has their very own dedicated Critical Role Youtube & Twitch channels–however, don’t worry, as it’ll still be broadcast in all current locations as well. After Dark will continue to be available on After Dark only.

    • There also will not be any Talks Machina or new Critical Role episode July 3 or July 5, as they’ll be making the move to a new studio during this week. (Marisha’s stepped down at G&S to make this move to full-time CR management as well.)

    • There’s a summary post of these announcements with a FAQ on, if you need more information. 

  • Stats for this episode:

    • The M9 have now officially rolled 99 natural ones. Nott’s in the lead with 22. Sam only has one d20 that he rolls, and he thinks Laura’s bad luck is rubbing off on him.

    • The M9 have now been traveling together for about a month. Matt, deadpan: “They’re such a tight-knit family.” He does like that everyone’s getting to see the ground-floor development and occasionally has to remind himself to set the scene because he gets sucked into the roleplay.

    • Kiri has imitated people 82 times–Sam loves Matt’s imitations. 

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Once Upon a Fairytale Cruise Masterpost

Once Upon a Fairytale Cruise Masterpost

Thanks to @drunken_pilot for this art work!

Once upon a time, a sponsored scarecrow, a Cristal-drinking housebreaker, a pair of magic-wielding exes, a raging queen, and portable hole enthusiast went on a singles cruise. It only got weirder from there.

Character Classes

  • Scarecrow: Scarecrow L4 Way of the Open Straw Monk
  • Peter Pan: Half-Elf L4 Bard
  • Wendy Darling: Human L4 Druid
  • Goldilocks: Human L4 Eldritch Knight Fighter
  • Queen of Hearts: Human L4 Path of the Berserker Barbarian
  • Hatter: Halfling L4 Wizard
  • Bonus: Sam revealed on Twitter that Jon Heder's character would have been the Tin Man!
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Bar Room Blitz Masterpost

Bar Room Blitz Masterpost

Thanks to @WendyDoodles for this art piece!

A starstruck sun elf, an angry tabaxi, the girl from The Ring, the D&D equivalent of My Chemical Romance, and some dwarves walk into a bar... hilarity ensues. Also Greep.

Damage dealt to others by the group: 126
Damage dealt to each other: 92
Time required to solve lock puzzle: 0:13:58


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Quick Answers 51

How many times has Taryon has puked since he appeared?

  • Episode 87 (0:46:15)
  • Episode 88 (2:23:53)
  • Episode 90 (2:35:38) and (2:35:57)
  • Episode 91 (2:50:44)
  • Episode 92 (3:20:38)
  • Episode 94 (3:31:08)

How many times has Vax used his Reliable Talent feature?

Approximately 95 times. An exact number is difficult because we don’t know how many times he rolled a natural 10 versus actually getting to use the feature.

Can we get a Monster Analysis for Sam Riegel? Because I'm pretty sure he's not human.

  • Sam Riegel, Bard Level 20
  • First Appearance: 01 Arrival at Kraghammer
  • Armor Class: 14
  • Speed: 30 ft
  • Fey Ancestry, Immune to charm effects
  • Proficient with wine aerating tools
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Gil References

Talks Machina 15 (0:38:32)

Brian: Should we have-- oh, I hate to do this to them, should we have CritRoleStats keep track of how many times Gil f***s someone or not?
Travis: Sure, yeah!
Matt: This is true; they don’t have enough to keep track of! Just throw more on the pile! I’m so sorry guys, I’m so sorry.
Brian: Andrew just threw a beer at the screen.
Gil: They’re five people, right?

Four, to be precise. Luckily, we have the most awesome volunteers in the world who stepped up to help us out! Updated to Episode 90.

For any critters who don’t know, Gil Ramirez is a blacksmith, critter, and all-around delightful person who forged dice for the Critical Role cast. You should go check out his work here.

Thanks to Alexandra, @ChrisVLinden, clefos, @dutchcritter, @EBalensuela, @fancynancypie, icecream-s-coops, @InvictusRob, @JacobSBrowning, @jgraveart, @Ju_Draakje, @_miss_maria_, mthwiz, @omrjeuss, Rosie-Lostbetweenthepages, @RowenaHighland1, soaringsparrows, Supertoasty, themeaningofnight, and zahra-hana for their work compiling this list!

  • Times Gil’s Dice Helped: 25
  • Times Gil’s Dice Hurt: 9
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Media References and Puns of Episode 90: Voice of the Tempest

Vox Machina: Making country songs out of fiends, shop owners, and city guardsmen since 2012

Media References

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