Livetweets of 2-127 Sarsaparilla, Licorice, and Red Hot
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"It takes three guards to make a snowman."
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Monster Analysis: Wirt and Hell Bovines (Diablo One-Shot)
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Thanks to @3rdclover for this art piece!
Wirt, Poltergeist
Armor Class ≤ 18
Resistant to Physical, Cold, Poison Damage
27 damage taken
Hell Bovines
Armor Class ≤ 15
45 HP
Hell Bovine 1: 61 damage taken, 24 killing blow by Indra
Hell Bovine 2: 45 damage taken: 22 killing blow by Laslo
Wirt was a teenager during the time of Tristram’s collapse to the forces of evil that overtook it. One of the people he admired, Gillian, had been attempting to get enough money together to put together some plan to help protect it. Her efforts were for naught, however, and Wirt was one of those who died, though Gillian escaped. Wirt arose into undeath as a spirit tied to his unfinished business, twisted into an unending obsession to collect more and more gold for her, even as he logically couldn’t leave and would never accumulate enough.
Read MoreMonster Analysis: Kresh the Unforgiven and Skeletons (Diablo One-Shot)
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Encounter Appearance: Diablo One-Shot
Armor Class: ≤ 17
Resistant to Poison
94 damage taken, 37 killing blow by Indra
What we know about Kresh in life was that he was a member of the Horadrim, a group of individuals whose goal it was to “stand for justice and light,” and rid the world of the Prime Evils. Deckard Cain, who gives our adventurers their mission, is a Horadric scholar. We don’t know what befell Kresh to earn him the title of “The Unforgiven” and to exist in the Tristram Cathedral as an undead skeleton. But he’s there and he’s conjuring skeletons: let’s fight!
Read MoreMonster Analysis: Ghouls (Diablo One-Shot)
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First Appearance: 1-010 K’Varn Revealed
Armor Class 12
Each ghoul had around 11-18 HP:
Mordred killed 4 ghouls
Tauro killed 2 ghouls
Indra, Laslo, Remy, and Remy’s swarm of insects each killed 1 ghoul
In Diablo I and II, Ghouls are a subset of Zombie, considered “the lowest rank of undead,” known for often being found in “the tombs and crypts of the whole of Sanctuary.” In Diablo III, they got their own undead category, and what they gained in speed, they lost in power. Attacking with their claws or whatever passed as a melee weapon around, their single attack dealt 3 damage, making this a good warmup fight for the adventuring party. Mechanically, this gave the players a chance to work out how all their new abilities work while not fighting a big boss.
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Media References and Puns of 2-126 Worth Fighting For
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Thanks to @cait_illustrate for this art piece!
“Hey. I love you, too.”
”That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard.”
Media References
(0:01:33) Laura: Brute force through us, Johnny Mnemonic.
(0:02:25) Sam: .... his universal soldier.
(0:02:36) Matt: Can’t handle a simple eenie meenie Bieber rhythm attack?
(cont) Laura: ... my jumpin’ jack flash drive. (“Jumpin’ Jack Flash” by the Rolling Stones)
(0:03:24) Matt: ...Swordfish. It’s always Swordfish.
(0:03:30) Matt: ...and you’ll drop faster than GameStop stock.
(0:04:19) Marisha: Old Michael Keaton Batman
(0:05:52) Marisha: It’s so Bob Loblaw’s Law Blog. (Arrested Development)
(0:16:26) Liam: Find me, Google Docs. Sam: We can’t say Google! Oh, s***, I said it!
(0:26:42) Liam: It’s a little bit like trying to find the Court of the Owls.
(0:35:33) Travis: *singing* It’s been a while! (Staind)
Livetweets of Diablo One-Shot
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"Whatever, we've got a skeleton, too, it's fine!" #JusticeForSpellslots
Read MoreLivetweets of 2-126 Worth Fighting For
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“I slap Fjord on the tit.”
(Editor’s note: it’s with great pain we didn’t select a quote from the second half, but, spoilers!)
Read MoreStats of Narrative Telephone: Questions and Quackery
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Thanks to @ cbtillustrates for this art piece!
Pretty.
Want a reminder how past stories went? We maintain our Narrative Telephone page here, where you can check out graphs overlooking the entire series, as well as consult our index for past individual tales.
Read MoreMedia References and Puns of 2-125 The Neverending Day
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Thanks to @TriaElf9 for this art piece!
"It's dangerous to go alone. Take this. And this. And this.
But I WANT IT BACK."
Media References
(0:00:41) Sam: Based on the animated series, The Dragon Prince.
(0:01:33) Sam: I call it Cyberpunk 1977. Mooching off the unparalleled success of Cyberpunk 2077, a cherished video game that left everyone completely satisfied…
(0:02:32) Sam: Yeah, looking dolled up like Alan Alda. I’ll fill up my Ford Pinto.
(0:02:52) Sam: Now I’m as fast as that brand new airplane, the Concorde.
(0:17:48) Matt: Not quite Gollum-esque…
(0:54:20) Travis: *singing* Give me something good. (“Tell Me Something Good” by Rufus ft. Chaka Khan)
(0:57:44) Taliesin: I think putting Voldemort in Skeletor is not necessarily the best…
Livetweets of 2-125 The Neverending Day
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"Can the cats be ninjas? Just like, five of them? Not all of them."
"There's a few ways to interpret that. Do you want cat ninjas, or ninjas instead of cats?"
Level 14 Update: Enter the Epic
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Thanks to @grimbanana for this art piece, and thanks to @luckymaggiepie, @Badassassin, and @EmanuelSilvaArt for the individual pieces used in this article!
After a harrowing end to their first trip into the icy tundra of Eiselcross, the Mighty Nein have hit level 14! There’s not really a common thread to the upgrades this time, but Caleb and Yasha both get some sweet new subclass abilities, Jester and Caduceus get a Destroy Undead upgrade, Beau and Veth get utility skills to help protect themselves, and Fjord gets either a spell upgrade or an ASI, depending on what class Travis chooses.
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